NOAH AND THE ARK

 

The Bible is “what fools have written, what imbeciles command, what rogues teach.” – Voltaire

**This post was recently revised to simplify things. It now contains all the separate posts together in one. When you wish to comment on a specific point please copy and paste it at the top of your comment so as not to confuse anybody. Also, if you wish to review any past comments all you need to do is click the NOAH AND THE ARK link in the categories section at the top right of my main page and scroll down. You will find the original, individual posts. Click on one and read any comments and responses there.

 

  • Luck They All Had Such Good Taste In Women – God so despised (so much for ‘good’) the offspring of the first nine generations of his creation he decided to not only kill them all (why bother with trying to save them?) but to kill every other living thing upon the face of the earth! No exception was made for children, pregnant women or even babies. Only Noah, his three sons and their four wives were spared. How convenient that Noah and his sons had such perfect taste in women.

 

  • Did God Cause The Worlds First Abortions? – In the time it took Noah to gather up all the animals (7 of every ‘clean’ beast & 2 of every ‘unclean’ beast & 7 of every fowl of both sexes (14 each) , and a male & female of every ‘creeping thing’) and construct the ark (even working with his sons and the wives it would have taken years), how many women became pregnant? How many gave birth? How many babies did God murder with the flood?

 

  • No Concern For Friends And Loved Ones? – How is it neither Noah, his sons, nor their wives were at all concerned about worshiping and blindly obeying a God (really Noah as he was the only one in direct communication) who was determined to kill all their friends and family? Did they all really believe everyone they knew deserved to be murdered?

 

  • Where’s A Sears When You Need One? – The tools required to build such a large vessel (100? times larger than any built at the time) didn’t exist at the time.

 

  • Simply Not Enough Trees For Such A Vessel – The lumber required to build such a large vessel (500ft long, 85ft wide, 60ft & 3 stories high) wasn’t readily available & would have been VERY expensive. Gen 6:15“…The length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.” The size is the equivalent of 522 standard stock cars or 8 freight trains of 65 cars each.

 

  • Um, is the water supposed to be coming through the windows? – The weight of the ark, filled to capacity with animals, food and supplies would result in a non-buoyant vessel.

 

  • Origin of the Species – How did all these species of animals migrate across numerous foreign continents in their return home after the flood and yet leave no trace behind? The fossil record should basically show that all species originated wherever the Ark landed (Turkey).

 

  • And Two of Every Parasite? – How did Noah keep the birds from eating all the insects? And what about the parasites they (and the other animals) carried? Do those count for the two of each living thing?

 

  • The Crew of The Ark – It would have been impossible for Noah, his wife, his three sons and their three wives, (8 people total) to both crew the vessel and care for and feed and clean up after all the animals.

 

  • Did God Provide The Blue Prints Too? – Only an expert ship builder could hope to construct a vessel never before imagined and hope to make it sea worthy.

 

  • The Big Question – Why all the trouble? Again, why didn’t God just snap his almighty fingers and poof there is the ark and snap all the animals are on board? Did he want to sit and stew in his anger while Noah and his sons attempted to obey his command. And better yet, why not just snap his almighty fingers and all the bad people just drop dead or disappear in a puff of smoke? Why the need to kill every living thing?

 

  • Pity The Fool Who Had To Wrangle The Brown Recluse – Insects must have been included (creeping things maybe) in the to be saved list, otherwise the majority would have drowned.

 

  • No Room For Fish? – Were all fish excluded? What happened to the fresh water fish when the seas rose and mixed with their water? And vice versa?

 

  • The Story of Noah’s Ark (Or How To Guarantee The Extinction of All Life) – As any zoologist will tell you, a male and female of any species aren’t necessarily compatible as mates and there is no guarantee if they were that they could produce an offspring.

 

  • The Big Question (AGAIN) – And in case any believer suggests at any point that God interfered in order to guarantee his plan worked out (i.e. all animals mated and produced offspring, never attacked one another, no sickness on board) I again ask why not just snap his almighty fingers and make all the offending humans fall dead? I mean if he is going to use his infinite powers to take part in the great plan, why not that?

 

  • Such A Drama Queen! – How many ‘clean’ or ‘unclean’ beasts are carnivores? How about the 14 of each fowl? And the creeping things? How many extra animals were brought on board to feed them? Or did God once again conveniently interfere to make the lions herbivores for the duration of the voyage? And if God is going to interfere at all, why not just strike down all those who truly deserved to die instead of murdering the whole world?

 

  • Just How Long After The Flood Were Lions Vegans? – And what about after the voyage? What did all the carnivores eat then? How many generations of animals would have to be born before they could all safely start preying on one another again?

 

  • Glad God Picked You, Noah – Noah, one of only 8 people on earth God deems worthy of sparing his wrath, at one point lies about naked and is spied on by his son, Ham. He gets drunk from wine of his own vineyard. How long does it take to get a vineyard going? How much priority was given to creating wine when they needed to repopulate and regrow the entire world? Gen. 9

 

  • After the Flood, Only Death and Disease – After the waters receded the whole of the earth would have been covered in rot and death. Disease would have been unavoidable.

 

  • Pork too? – After the flood, of the few remaining animals left on earth, God tells Noah, “…every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you.” Gen. 9:3 How quickly would each species become extinct if such an occurrence had actually taken place? And what happened to kosher?

 

  • Every Living Thing – “And every living substance was destroyed which was upon the face of the ground, both man and cattle, and the creeping things, and the fowl of the heaven; and they were destroyed from the earth; and Noah only remained alive, and they that were with him in the ark.” Gen 7:23 Please don’t suggest that fish, or whales, or plants survived God’s tantrum.

Please visit my main page (https://doubtingthomas426.wordpress.com/) to gain a better understanding of where I am coming from. There you will find all my observations regarding religion and the bible categorized on the top Right hand side of the page. Please feel free to read through them and leave a comment or two if you like.

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One Response to “NOAH AND THE ARK”

  1. And yet storylines contrived nowadays that make PERFECT sense are BADMOUTHED, while THIS fairytale is WORSHIPPED by millions of “believers”…………………………..

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