“The most ridiculous concept ever perpetrated by Homo Sapiens is that the Lord God of Creation, Shaper and Ruler of the Universes, wants the saccharine adoration of his creations, that he can be persuaded by their prayers, and becomes petulant if he does not receive this flattery. Yet this ridiculous notion, without one real shred of evidence to bolster it, has gone on to found one of the oldest, largest and least productive industries in history.” – Robert Heinlein
**This post was recently revised to simplify things. It now contains all the separate posts together in one. When you wish to comment on a specific point please copy and paste it at the top of your comment so as not to confuse anybody. Also, if you wish to review any past comments all you need to do is click the JESUS H. CHRIST link in the categories section at the top right of my main page and scroll down. You will find the original, individual posts. Click on one and read any comments and responses there.
- Why do Christians have such a high opinion of this guy? – Matt 15:22-28 – Describes an encounter between Jesus and a Gentile woman who begs him to heal her daughter. Jesus ignores the woman. She persists and he finally says to her, “I am not sent but unto the lost sheep of the house of Israel. It is not meet to take the children’s (Jews) bread and to cast it to dogs (Gentiles).” Woman won’t give up and eventually Jesus finally relents and heals the child. Christians want us to worship a God who refused to heal an innocent child until he was pressured into it. Wow.
- How conveeeeeeenient – How convenient that almost (maybe all) all demons cast out of someone by Jesus immediately identify him as the son of God (for the benefit of those witnessing the spectacle). Luke 8, Luke 4:41, Mark 3:11, Mark 1:23 – 28…
- How conveeeeeeenient II – Malachi’s prophecy that told of the arrival of the Messiah clearly states that Elias (Elijah) would return before the Messiah does. When Jesus is confronted with this fact he states that Elias did come … but no one noticed. Matt 17:12. Simple enough! I guess we’ll just have to take his word for it. It’s not like he could have an ulterior motive or anything. He even tries to pass off the identity of Elias onto John the Baptist to help cement him as the Messiah but John denies that he is Elias. John 1:20, 21.
- Jesus was a bigot – Matt 10:5, 6 – depicts Jesus instructing his workers to go out and spread his word, but only to the Jews. “Go not into the way of the Gentiles … but rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.”
- Not really the welcome I was expecting, guys – In Luke 24:37 when Jesus rises from the dead and appears to the eleven apostles, they are terrified. Didn’t they know he would be returning? How little faith did they have in their own Messiah? Why so little preparation for his return? Most of Jesus’ followers just went back to life as normal or went into hiding. Lazarus’ return from the dead was met with more enthusiasm.
- Was Jesus cool with animal sacrifice? – The people Jesus so dramatically drove from the temple were merchants who sold doves for the sacrifices people regularly made there. Yet Jesus never condemns the sacrifices themselves.
- What’s with this guy? – Matthew 10:35, 36 – What is Jesus’ deal? “For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household.” These are Jesus’ words.
- As with all religions, at its core, it’s all about sex – Matt 25:1-13 – Jesus tells an allegory explaining how everyone must be prepared for his arrival at the end of the world: He tells of ten virgins (of course) awaiting their one bridegroom, but five forget to bring extra oil for the lamps and run out to get some. While they are away, the bridegroom arrives. When the virgins return to a locked door they implore him to open to them. He replies, “Verily I say unto you, I know you not.” This story is creepy not because it reflects the exclusive quality of Christianity, but for its depiction of ten virgins for one bridegroom.
- Sorry, I didn’t recognize you Penis, er, I mean, Jesus – What did Jesus wear upon resurrection? He was in his same body but Luke 24:12 clearly says his grave clothes were left behind. Yet when he shows up with the apostles, he makes no mention of clothes nor do they. Is he naked?
- Hey, aren’t you that Messiah fella? – If Jesus was so popular, why then did he need to be identified by Judas in the garden of Gethsemane?
- Jesus wasn’t even the best Messiah – Considering the number of people claiming to be Messiah back then, it would have been nice if there could have been just a few unbiased witnesses to Jesus’ resurrection and ascension. After all, one ‘false’ Messiah had 400 followers when he was executed, that’s 280 more than Jesus had.
- Jesus is kind of a dick – Luke 9:59-62 – depicts Jesus recruiting his disciples. When one asks if he can bury his recently deceased father, Jesus says, “Let the dead bury the dead.” And when another wishes to say farewell to his family back home, Jesus says, “No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the Kingdom of God.” In Matt 4:21, 22 two other disciples are forced to leave their father to mend the fishing nets by himself.
- What happened to Honour thy father and thy mother – John 2: 1-4 – Jesus to his mother, “Woman, what have I to do with thee?”
- Please Jesus, chop it off – Matt 19:12 – reminds us that sex with women is unholy and Jesus gives extra commendation to eunuchs, especially those who castrate themselves.
- Jesus: Not an Environmentalist – Matt 21:19 & Mark 11:13 – When Jesus gets hungry & finds a fig tree bearing no fruit, the reason being that it’s out of season, he curses it. “Let no fruit grow on thee henceforth forever.” The tree withers away on the spot. No one is with Jesus at the time so we’ll just have to take his word for it.
- Jesus, so full of love and kindness – Matt 11:20-23 – Jesus damns whole cities to hell. “Woe unto thee, Chorazin! Woe unto thee, Bethsaida! … And thou, Capernaum … shalt be brought down to hell.”
- Check out the big ego on Jesus – Matt 12:6 – “In this place is one greater than the Temple.” Matt 12:41 – “Behold, a greater than Jonas is here.” Matt 12:42 – “Behold, a greater than Soloman is here.”
- Do as I say, not as I do – In Matt 5:22 Jesus says not to call anyone a fool but in Matt 23:17 he says of the Pharisees, “Ye fools and blind.” Matt 23:33 – “Ye serpents, ye generation of vipers, how can ye escape the damnation of hell?” Matt 12:34 – “O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things?”
- Fools for taking Jesus at his word – Luke 21:32 – Jesus, speaking of the second coming –“Verily I say unto you, This generation shall not pass away, till all be fulfilled.” The Apostles actually believed they would be the first occupants of heaven from the rapture, not as a result of death. How could they have been so wrong?
- Not even an original Messiah – Every one of Jesus’ so called miracles was preformed by another non Messiah in the bible before and/or after him.
- Another odd choice – Why does Jesus choose Peter to be the foundation/cornerstone of the church when Peter earlier famously lies and denies Christ three times and later frightens two early converts to death over the matter of a few coins? And Jesus calls Peter ‘Satan’ at one point. Matt. 16:18, 23, Acts 5, Matt. 26:69-75.
- Jesus: Not a member of PETA – Jesus casts a horde of demons out of a couple of protesters (because they must be possessed if they don’t dig the Messiah) and per the demons wishes, casts them into a herd of 2,000 pigs. The pigs then run violently into the sea and die. That herd must have been of great value to he who owned them but Jesus does not compensate this person. Besides, to eat swine they must have been Gentiles, so fuck ‘em! Matt. 8:28-33 and Mark 5:13.
- Some of the ridiculous teachings/commands of Jesus: Accumulate no wealth; turn the other cheek; judge no ones behavior; don’t use your mind but be as children; do not question or philosophize; love those who mistreat you; avoid associating with the ‘dogs’ (Gentiles) of this world; sell all your possessions and give it to the poor (now you’re poor! Hoorah!); have no thought for the morrow (make no plans); everything you do and have is probably a sin; take no pleasure in this world; love those who treat you cruelly as much as those that are kind to you; mutilate yourself; be 100% certain Jesus bought your way into heaven through his torturous death; if the sight of someone of the opposite sexually arouses you, pluck out your eye; for special approval with God, become a eunuch; Servants, obey your masters; citizens, obey your rulers unquestioningly; children, obey your parents in all things; love your enemies; abandon your family and be rewarded in heaven; do not assert yourself; do not achieve prominence in this world, for the first shall be the last in heaven; if a criminal robs you of $50.00, give him another $50.00; etc. (By the way, how can love be a command? Love is an emotional response and can not be controlled.)
- Bad Career move – John 21 – describes how after Jesus’ resurrection, some disciples go back to their fishing jobs but somehow have totally forgotten how to do it. It takes Jesus telling them to toss their nets off the other side of their boats for them to catch anything. They catch so many (153) that they can’t haul up their nets (thanks a bunch, Jesus!). In the bible this suggestion is treated as another of Jesus’ miracles.
Please visit my main page (https://doubtingthomas426.wordpress.com/) to gain a better understanding of where I am coming from. There you will find all my observations regarding religion and the bible categorized on the top Right hand side of the page. Please feel free to read through them and leave a comment or two if you like.
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